Changes

I think that God must have been in a somewhat Puckish mood the day that he created me.

Because I certainly seem to be bumbling around in the woods a lot lately.

Life seems to be taking me in an unexpected direction these days, although in retrospect I suppose that I should have seen it coming.

The first week in October, I came home from a family wedding only to find that my husband wanted a divorce. He had discovered a Blog that I had been writing for several months, and he was not pleased, to say the least. I believe that blind fury might be an apt description for his mood when he picked me up from the airport.

Oh the Blog wasn't the only thing going on in the marriage. Not by a long shot. But it was a significant symptom in a marriage that had gone horribly wrong.

I took the Blog down, and even stopped viewing the Blogs of others, in the vain hope that I could repair the damage that had been done. But once something is said, or in this case written, it cannot be taken back or forgotten.

And thus my marriage has ended.

In the time between then and now more has changed than has remained the same. I've moved to a beautiful seaside town about an hour north of where I had been. I have friends here. With all that is secure crashing down around me, the comfort of being near friends seems like a good idea.

I'm grieving. Although I believe that my grief is more for what I wanted my marriage to be, rather than what it actually was. But dreams die hard, and the loss feels the same.

So I'm picking myself up and trying to dust off the the sharp shards that seem to be clinging to me. And I'll move forward, though towards what, I haven't got a clue . . .